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realcrazycowboy said:
(This was supposed to be posted in my account not my fiances. >_< )I think therapy would help, or surrounding yourself with people who only say positive things about you. I have been dealing with this same thing forever. I’m 20 now and living with my fiance in his hometown. I can count the number of times I have gone to town alone on one hand. I too am afraid of rejection and have no clue what to say to people. If I do talk, I feel after wards that everything I said was stupid. I have never been to a therapist but now I’m wishing I had when all of this started getting so bad. Now I feel like all eyes are on me and everyone is talking, yet I know I am not that important. The website Topix does not help. People I never met are saying they now me and make fun of the way I look. So word of advice. You hear one bad comment about you anywhere, just never go there again.
# 15 August 2010 at 12:51 pm

Elly said:
There are different things that you can do to improve your self but first i believe that is important that you believe in your self, you need feed your self confidence.
Your strengths can be any skill that you have, any sport that you play, cooking, playing an instrument, reading fast, passion for a topic or anything you love that you know a lot of.
You have some weakness, those may be lack of social skills or you are too shy, etc. The point is that everyone has strengths and weakness as you, is just that you are too focus on your weakness, you are being too self conscious and you need to change your focus to your strengths.
Now, focus on your strengths on what you are good at and you love to do, there are many people that would like to have the skills you have and will love you to share with them.
Here is a tip to deal with social anxiety, find and meet people that like to do what you do, have the same hobby or passion. For example if you like to play tennis find people that want to play tennis or take classes and meet those people, that will be an easier way to meet new friends rather than going to a difficult environment like the disco.
Another way is to find people that have problems or that need help for something that you are good at, that are your strengths and offer them your help, they will love you for it, you will make new friends and feel more comfortable with them.
For some people pushing themselves forward to make social interactions and meet others becomes impossible even if they have the same interests and hobbies. So its important to look for professional help to you reduce your anxiety and avoid depression.
Medications can help you reduce anxiety and behavioral therapy can help you control your disorder or overcome it. In a behavioral therapy a psychotherapist identifies your thoughts and beliefs so he can then change them by make you understand that those beliefs are irrational.
What you can do to identify your beliefs is, try a social situation on your daily life, something that makes you anxious, then when you get home write down what were your thoughts at that moments, how you felt and why do you think you were anxious, what did you think the other person though about you?
I have given you a general overview of how to deal with social anxiety, but the best way is to find professional help so someone can give you a treatment for your particular situation.
You can find more information about anxiety here
Thanks
# 16 August 2010 at 8:43 am

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